The most important ingredient for true happiness

The most important ingredient for true happinessThe most important ingredient for true happinessOne of the benefits of being both ambitious and obsessive/compulsive is how such qualities can accelerate your career success.I spent over twenty-six years in the law enforcement profession. I promoted quickly through the ranks due to my work ethic, which welches drilled into me by my father.Follow Ladders on FlipboardFollow Ladders magazines on Flipboard covering Happiness, Productivity, Job Satisfaction, Neuroscience, and moraGet to work early, stay late, and always do a little mora than everyone else, my Dad used to say.I took his advice and in sixteen short years went from rookie police officer to chief of police.Theres no question that ambition and relentless drive can lead to results, but there are always unwanted consequences.I was a workaholic. There were important family events I missed. The stress started to take a toll on my health, leading to anxiety and panic attacks. Despite a handsome salary and career prestige, I was never truly happy.I used to be a classic workaholic, and after seeing how little work and career really mean when you reach the end of your life, I put a new emphasis on things I believe count more. These things include family, friends, being part of a community, and appreciating the little joys of the average day. - MitchAlbomArtwork by John P. WeissFortunately, my doctor came to the rescue. He started to ask about my artwork, and how often I made time for it. A certified Hakomi psychotherapist, my doctor was able to drill down and help me overcome the anxiety and panic attacks.I started saying no to new commitments, carved out more time for family, focused on helping others more, and made my artwork a priority.I was happier not because I put myself first, but because I balanced out work, family time, helping others and my artwork. There was now a sweet spot in my life.The answer isvirtueThe author Edith Hall wrote anarticlein the Wall Street Journal based on her book,Aristotles Way How Ancient Wisdom Can Change Your Life.Hall examines Aristotles perspective on happiness, which probably differs from most of our views.Thomas Jefferson, in the Declaration of Independence, wrote about Life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness. American culture often focuses on the holy trinity of wealth, pleasure and fame. Hollywood entertainment largely revolves around ansicht things. But do they really make us happier?Aristotle would agree that a good life includes happiness, but not happiness based on wealth, pleasure or fame.Aristotle lived and worked among the Macedonian royal family, who were the elites. He watched their conspicuous consumption, lavish lifestyles, and petty plots against one another.Edith Hall, commenting on wealth, pleasure and fame seekersSuch people spend their lives acquiring material possessions or seeking sensory gratification, but on some level they know that these pursuits arent conducive to true happi ness.Consider the glitterati of todays entertainment industry. How many Hollywood icons succumb to drugs, alcohol, serial divorces, and public squabbles? Despite tremendous wealth and fame, many celebrities appear to be unhappy.Edith Hall addsAristotle saw that these seemingly fortunate members of the elite were actually miserable. Such people spend their lives acquiring material possessions or seeking sensory gratification, but on some level they know that these pursuits arent conducive to true happiness. They may even recognize the right thing to do, but they are too weak or lazy to act on it.So, whats the right thing to do? If being a workaholic and focusing on wealth, pleasure and fame wont bring lasting happiness, what will?According to Aristotle, the answer isvirtue.Living our lives by the highest moral and ethical standards. This sometimes means bypassing immediate gain or pleasure for a higher good, but in the end, this will lead to a happier life.The best possible version o fyourselfAristotle analyzed a wide range of human traits, from courage and anger to how we treat one another and regard money. He argued that we should strive for themeanbetween extremes.According to the Wall Street Journal articleAll of us possess these properties, and happiness comes from cultivating each one in the correct amount, so that it is a virtue (arete) rather than a vice.What does all this mean? Namely, that you shouldpursue a virtuous life. Acknowledge the best and worst in yourself, and strike a balance.Hone your habits of generosity, integrity, fairness, and kindness. Find the sweet spot in your life, focusing on family, helping others, and your passions.Edith Hall summed it up this wayReal happiness, Aristotle believed, comes from a continuous effort to become the best possible version of yourself.The other night, I was tempted to spend the evening working on new articles that might earn me some money. The drive to get ahead still courses through my thoughts and effo rts.Thankfully, I decided to visit my disabled, elderly mother instead. When youre 85 years old with advanced Parkinsons disease, any family visit is a blessing. It made me feel good to visit her.After the visit, I returned to my art studio and crafted the landscape painting above this article. I didnt paint it for money or fame. I painted it for the same reason that I visited my mother to invest in the best possible version of myself.How about you? Why not invest in the best possible version of yourself? Make more time for family. Help others. Strike a balance between work and passions. Pursue a virtuous life. Do these things, and a deeper sense of contentment will wash over you.True happiness doesnt come from wealth, pleasure or fame. Rather, it comes from an internal state of mind, anchored in the contentment only attained by living life in the best way possible.Before you goIm John P. Weiss. I paint landscapes, draw cartoons and write about life. Thanks for readingThis article f irst appeared in Medium.You might also enjoyNew neuroscience reveals 4 rituals that will make you happyStrangers know your social class in the first seven words you say, study finds10 lessons from Benjamin Franklins daily schedule that will double your productivityThe worst mistakes you can make in an interview, according to 12 CEOs10 habits of mentally strong people

How to identify a toxic culture before accepting a job

How to identify a toxic culture before accepting a jobHow to identify a toxic culture before accepting a jobYou did it. You landed the interview for a job that seems to check all the boxes. The salary is right and the job description is in your wheelhouse. As exciting as it is to get called in for an interview, you dont have the job yet.When the day of the interview comes, youll face a whirlwind of questions from your potential employer to help them determine if youre a good fit. Most interviews focus heavily on necessary skills, but theres more to a job than that.How do you know if youre walking into a toxic environment?When being interviewed, you should already be looking for indicators to decide if this is the right job for you. There isnt a one-size-fits-all solution to finding a toxic culture before you get hired, but there are some flags you can look for during the interview process to help you make a better decision.Listen to whats not being saidAccording to studies performed by UCLAs Professor Emeritus of Psychology Albert Mehrabian, only about 7% of communication comes from the actual words spoken. The other 93% comes from body language (55%) and tone of voice (38%).Knowing this, make a note of how people are communicating during your initial office tour. Is there a sense of fear or panic in their body language or tone of voice? Or is there a genuine excitement and passion?Another warning sign of a toxic culture comes when people need to eat meals at their desk.As youre taking the tour, look - or smell - for signs of this. When leadership doesnt have a good process in place for scaling, people are left scrambling.Take a restroom breakAs silly as it sounds, you can tell a lot about the companys culture by how well maintained their bathroom is. World-renowned chef Anthony Bourdain wrote in his book Kitchen Confidential about the importance of keeping the restroom clean. If they dont, it leads to the fantasie running wild with what the kitchen might loo k like.The same concept can be applied to jobs outside of the restaurant industry.If theres an empty toilet paper roll, thats a red flag. If someone didnt care enough about the next person to take a few seconds out of their day to change the roll, what does that say about how they work together? This can be the sign of a culture where not taking the responsibility for each others well-being is commonplace.Ask cultural questions in the interviewTheres always time to ask questions either during an interview or as youre being given the office tour. Take advantage of these opportunities to get a peek into the culture.A great place to departure is by asking about their core values. In a positive company culture, everyone can identify what the core values are and what they mean. Are they real values or are they just used as decoration hanging on the wall around the office? For example, if Trust is a core value but you noticed people locking up the belongings on their desk during your offi ce tour, thats a red flag for a toxic culture.Sometimes you can get an idea of how strong a companys culture is,by how much they try to guard it during the interview. As the gatekeepers to the culture, are your interviewers asking you questions that are helping them decide if youre a cultural fit? Or are they entirely focused on your skillset and just looking to check off the boxes to get the job filled?Every company gives their employees a basic paycheck, but few go further to truly build a culture that matters. As youre looking for a new place to work, keep this in mind as you think beyond the size of the paycheck and the skills to do the job. Some people can endure a toxic work environment. Some might be able to do great work under negative conditions. But you shouldnt have to. Life is too short to not love the place you work.Piyush Patel is theauthor of Lead Your Tribe, Love Your Work An Entrepreneurs Guide to Creating a Culture That Matters

How to Follow up on Your Record Demo

How to Follow up on Your Record DemoHow to Follow up on Your Record DemoYoure an aspiring musician whos ready to reach for the stars. Youve recorded a demo. Youve researched record labels. Youve sent your demo to the right people. After you send your demo to a record label, what is the next step? While it would be nice if the phone started ringing right away, chances are that you are going to need to follow up on your demo. The approach you take when you follow up makes all the difference. The wrong follow-up ensures it will never be heard. Here are some label-friendly music demo follow-up practices that just might work. Important Rules for Contacting Record Labels Check the Label Demo PolicyMost record labels have a demo policy, and sometimes the policy explains how you can follow up on your demo. You really, really must stick to the policy, even if it states that follow-ups are elend welcome. Being that person to send the I know you said not to get in touch, BUT.. email is not going to do you any favors. Frustrating though it may be, if the label doesnt accept follow-ups, youre going to need to take a deep breath. You can wait for the label to call, but meanwhile, keep reaching out to other labels. Use EmailAssuming follow-ups are welcome or the demo policy doesnt specify, send an email asking for feedback. The labels site will likely list the email address for the person who deals with demos If it doesnt, use the AR address. If there isnt one of those, try the general info address.Your email should be brief and to the point. State who you are, when you sent your demo and ask if anyone has had a chance to listen to it yet. Request some feedback and offer to send more information if necessary.DO NOT follow up by phone, unless the demo policy says phone calls are OK. Space Out Your Follow-UpsAsking for some feedback on your demo is not unreasonable, but keep in mind that the person on the other end of the email is likely getting lots of emails like yours. T ry sending an email once a month it is the right balance of reminding labels that your demo is waiting to be listened to and not being a pest. How to Respond to a Rejection You sent an email asking about your demo, and you finally got the response you were waiting for. The label tells you youre not a good fit for the label. This kind of rejection is not at all unusual most major recording artists have a file full of them. But the standard youre not a good fit tells you nothing at all about your musicits just a kind way of saying thanks but no thanks. At this point, you dont really know what the label disliked about your demo. And of course, the more you know, the better youll be able to improve your submission next time. Did they like your work or think you had eignung? Was there a technical problem that got between you and a contract? Would they be willing to consider another demo with some specific changes? This is your chance to pick up a little free advice. Send an email tha nking them for taking the time to check out your music, and then ask if they might recommend any other labels. You might get some insight into how other people hear your music, and you might end up finding your perfect label.